"God is eagerly waiting for the chance to answer your prayers and fulfill your dreams, just as he always has. But he can't if you don't pray, and he can't if you don't dream. In short, he can't if you don't believe."
-Jeffrey R. Holland

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Lucky #7

As I lay here in my happy place on the corner of the couch, curled up with one dog at my feet, another on the floor in front of me, and my husband beside me, I am remind just how blessed I am to live such a healthy, happy life.  We live in a beautiful home, have loving families, loyal friends, and great jobs.  We have created so many wonderful memories in our four years of marriage so far, and I always look forward to adding more to the list.  I have always dreamt of being a mother.  As far back as I can remember, it was the one thing I have always wanted more than anything.  I remember making lists with my sisters of our favorite baby names when we were just kids; it is still one of my favorite things to do. 

With an incredible amount of help from our friends and families, Kyhle and I have been blessed with the opportunity to try in vitro fertilization, also known as IVF.  We knew it would be a long, hard process, filled with many ups and downs.  A month ago, I ordered all of my medications and received them in the mail a few days later.  We went to our IVF conference and met with the nurse about how to mix and administer all of the injections, and they gave me a calendar marked with the days and times I needed to take certain medications.  It was becoming more and more real.  Two weeks ago, I started taking the injections, Gonal-F and Menopur.  They are follicle stimulating hormones, and they create the follicles that "house" the eggs.  The doctor wants your follicles between 18-25 mm for retrieval.  The bigger the follicle, the better chance there is an egg inside.  Along the the injections, I also took Dexamethasone, which is a hormone suppressor, and Doxycycline, which is a strong antibiotic to help prevent me from getting sick.  I have also been taking Metformin for my insulin, and pre-natal vitamins, Magnesium, and Vitamin D.  

Over the last couple of weeks, I was monitored every couple of days with blood work and ultrasounds so they could watch the growth of my follicles.  We were feeling pretty discouraged, as my follicles weren't growing at the rate they had hoped, and I wasn't developing as many as they'd like to see.  On average, an IVF patient has 10 eggs for retrieval, but because of my low AMH levels, (I was born with fewer eggs than the average woman), my doctor was expecting we would get half of that.  My ultrasounds were showing that I only had 2 good size follicles, and 2 medium sized.  I was feeling concerned and down-in-the-dumps with my numbers, and really praying we would be able to somehow get some more follicles. Dr. Gentry decided to have me take my injections one more night to see if we could give them a boost and set my retrieval for Tuesday instead of Monday.  

My alarm went off at 1:45 Monday morning, and it was time for my HCG trigger shot.  This shot is given 36 hours before retrieval, and it triggers ovulation.  I climbed out of bed and went to the kitchen to get everything together.  This was the shot I was pretty terrified to give myself.  The needle is quite large and had to go in to my thigh.  I stood in the kitchen with the needle pointing at my leg for 20 minutes, and then finally went to wake Kyhle up to see if he would give it to me instead.  Of course he said no, so back to the kitchen I went.  I waited 10 more minutes and finally just did it!  It didn't hurt as bad as I was expecting and I was relieved it was over.  Unfortunately, I got so worked up over all of it that I couldn't fall back to sleep until 3:30, and I had to be up for work at 6.  :(

Then came Tuesday--today.  Kyhle and I left for the hospital around 12 PM and got all signed in for retrieval.  I was feeling extra nervous, which caused an uncomfortable amount of nausea and anxiety.  They took us upstairs and got me all hooked up to the IV and monitors.  This was more intense than I was thinking!  As my nurse walked us back in to the surgery room, my whole body was trembling.  I had in my head that this wouldn't be painful because I had pain meds through my IV.  Boy, was I wrong!  As soon as Dr. Gentry started his work, I was in tears.  There would be sudden, sharp amounts of pain and pressure that I had never felt before.  I am so grateful I had Kyhle by my side the whole time--he rubbed my head, held my hand, and wiped all of my tears.  I was crying from the pain, and then every time the nurse said "first egg!", "second egg!", "third egg!", I started sobbing more and more.  The best part? Seven eggs.  Seven!  I only had four follicles, but I had fluid in my ovaries and there were a few eggs hiding in there!  Dr. Gentry was so excited and just kept saying how pleased and surprised he was.  We never thought we would get seven eggs. 

Now we wait.  I will get a call tomorrow morning from the lab and they will let me know how many of our eggs fertilized and how many didn't survive.  Dr. Gentry says on average, 25% will not fertilize.  So far, we are scheduled for a day 5 transfer, which means they will put the embryos back to their "natural habitat" on Sunday.  I have tomorrow off work to stay home and rest all day, and hopefully will feel good enough to return Thursday.  They sent me home with pain and nausea medication, so I am hoping that will be all I need.  I am trying to save my PTO in case I get some pregnancy sickness. ;) We are so excited to see what happens next, and after finding our seven eggs, can't help but feel so hopeful and full of faith.  We know that this is a huge blessing from Heavenly Father, and know that He hears and answers prayers.  So for now, we keep praying, and keep believing in miracles.  


1 comment: