After spending a couple of weeks in California with 4 of my nieces and nephews, I told Kyhle that I needed to wait a little while to try for a baby. I was exhausted, stressed, and just completely worn out. When he picked me up at the airport, there was a baby that he pointed out saying she was a cutie. I turned to him and said, "No. No baby is cute to me right now." I said that? I never thought I'd say those words! Ha!
Don't get me wrong, I am so grateful I had the opportunity to stay with my nieces and nephew while Ryan and Jeri went on vacation, but it was a lot of hard work and I totally underestimated how challenging it would be taking care of 4 kids by myself. I have always said that my sister-in-law is Super Mom. She is always on the go and keeps her kids so active and involved, which is great! However, I am not used to that lifestyle, so it was quite an adjustment. I didn't think it would be too hard because I work with more than 4 kids everyday. Here's the biggest difference-- I go home by myself at the end of the day!! There were some days where I couldn't wait to just go in my room and close the door for the night. Moms are amazing, and anyone who says otherwise is just...not. :)
Luckily, I am back on track and want my baby! I knew that feeling of wanting to put it off would go away pretty fast. But first things first, and I have some good news! My insurance accepted my claim for my reduction surgery, and they will cover the whole procedure, including an overnight at the hospital! When I asked them how much I would end up paying out of pocket, her response was, "Zero! You have already met your deductible and you have no co-pay!" I am one lucky girl to still get to be on my dad's insurance!!
So that's that. I have scheduled the surgery for Tuesday, July 23. I am somewhat nervous with the timing because my sister, Laura, is due to have her baby one week after that. Let's all hope baby girl Hayes comes on time and not early. :) I am going to be off work from July 23-August 5. When I return, I still have to be super cautious with lifting and making sure I don't move around too much. It'll definitely be a tough 6 weeks of recovering. How is that possible with my job? Maybe I'll have to plan to do a lot of desk work that first week back.
Now that it is scheduled and planned, I am definitely starting to feel the nerves. This is something I have wanted to do for a few years now, and I just kept putting off and putting off. I know it is time to move on and go forward with life, but parts of me feel like I just need to wait a few more years, and see if a baby comes along. But I can't just keep putting it off. I can't keep living my life saying, "What if we get pregnant?" Now I have to say, "What if we don't, and I waited for years with this daily physical pain?" I really hate "what-ifs"!
